Always Saying Yes, Yes, Yes

Do people keep asking for your time, energy, and money? Are you always making time for others but never have enough time for yourself? Are you always expending physical and emotional energy on behalf of others but have little left for yourself?  Do you always seem to be the one to pay for things or the one who always gets approached for a loan?

Are you stressed by how much you feel you must do for others, about constant commitments to do things you simply don’t have the time, energy, money, or desire to do? Do you keep doing all this when you would rather not?  Do you feel guilty when you say NO to these kinds of demands?

What would happen if you just said NO to some of these requests? What would happen if you picked the one thing that bothered you the most and said NO to that?

Learning To Say No

You are bombarded daily with requests for your time, energy, and money. Helping others is not a bad thing. You want to do the “right” thing. You don’t want to see others suffer. You want to be seen as kind, not be thought of as heartless. You want to show love and get love in return. However, overdoing it, by constantly doing things for others while not fulfilling our own needs, is a healthy personality trait taken to excess.

In the end, this tendency is extremely unhealthy. If you find yourself having a problem saying NO in virtually all relationships in your life, then you have a tendency to give over your power in your relationships and it is likely that you have lost your own identity. When you don’t stand up for yourself by saying NO when you really should, negative things happen: people take advantage of you; life becomes chaotic; you feel abused; your self-esteem fades away; and you struggle to find joy and fulfillment in your life.

In the end you will get to a point where you simply cannot tolerate it anymore. You will begin to feel resentful and angry. This is the point where you will know that you have had enough – when it’s time to draw the line. At this point you need to learn to say NO. Learning to say NO at the right times allows you to take control of your life again, regain your identity, find joy and fulfillment, and restore a sense of order to your life. Saying NO at the right time, in the right way, is never the wrong thing to do. It is the right thing to do for you and for the others involved.

Take control – learn to say NO.

Good communication is the key to success. Clarity and purpose flow from good communication. Without good communication confusion and chaos reigns.

While any communication can get results, clear and purposeful communication is powerful and much more likely to get the desired results. A good understanding of how to convey information, how to hear and see information, and how to interpret the meaning of information is essential to clear, powerful, purposeful, and effective communication.

These quick tips that will make your conversations more effective instantly. They are based on a proven understanding of how the mind operates and how it uses language and other non-verbal communication systems to code, order, and give meaning to the experiences which are provided through our nervous system (our mind) via our senses.

These tips are primarily focused on the use of spoken language. The mind processes spoken language and written language slightly differently, and this book is of course written language. Therefore, some of the examples may not strike you as being true. When, however, you hear the examples spoken aloud the impact and your understanding will be immediate.

Are you really confident in some areas of your life and not so confident and successful in other areas of your life? Why? What is holding you back? Would you like to be able to take that confidence you have in certain areas of your life and be able to use it anywhere and at any time you want?

This technique – creating your own personal circle of excellence – will allow you to take the confidence you have in one area of your life and transfer it to any area of your life at any time you choose. You will be able to create a positive, confident state anytime you want.

Are you really confident in some areas of your life and not so confident and successful in other areas of your life? Why? What is holding you back? EXCUSES ARE!  Excuses are one of the biggest reasons that we are not as confident or successful as we want to be in all areas of our lives.

Your thoughts are a direct route to your feelings. Your feelings affect your behavior. And, consequently, your behavior is the end result of your thoughts. It all begins with your thoughts and beliefs. Your beliefs and thoughts will determine what you think is, or is not, possible. These beliefs and decisions will consciously and unconsciously guide how you live your life and respond to life’s events.

Conscious negative thoughts, or limiting decisions and beliefs will programme your unconscious mind to take action on your behalf to achieve the thoughts that you have been thinking. So, even when your thoughts are negative, your unconscious mind will work hard to make them come true for you! Therefore, limiting decisions and beliefs will place restrictions on you and create obstacles about who you can be, what you can do, and what you can achieve. These limiting beliefs and decisions, when expressed consciously, become a list of excuses for not taking action and moving forward in many areas of your life. Excuses grow from your limiting beliefs and decisions.

Excuses are as old as humanity. We all make excuses and everyone uses them in one area or another of their life. You’ve used them before and chances are you will use a couple tomorrow. They have become a normal part of your life. However, excuses make it easy for you to get hung up on why something cannot be done instead of why you can do it.